Jun 29, 2020 | Where to Begin

Is an Open Relationship for Everyone? 4 Ways to Determine if it is Right For You

Have you ever wondered what it would be like to be with someone other than your partner? If so, you are not alone. Feelings of wanting more out of an intimate relationship are actually common. While an open relationship might not be the answer to everyone’s needs, there are a few telltale signs that you might benefit from one.

1. You Have Always Been Uncomfortable With Monogamy

Society has conditioned us to think that we’re automatically in the wrong when thoughts of intimacy with someone other than a partner occur. This doesn’t mean that these thoughts are wrong, or that there’s anything wrong with you. It just means that the majority of people don’t admit it for fear of judgment. In fact, open relationships might be more common than you think. An estimated one out of 25 couples are in some form of an open relationship.

Just as monogamy is natural to some individuals, it can make others feel uncomfortable. If you look at cultures all over the world, there are all different types of relationships. When you remove societal constraints, you can focus on what works in your relationship and ultimately makes you comfortable.

2. You are Self-Reflective and Good at Communicating

Good communication is one of the most important resources in a successful relationship, whether you are monogamous or not. Open relationships take work, just as monogamous ones do. Learning to self-reflect and communicate your wants and needs with your partner is key to making an open relationship work for you.

Being self-reflective is also important in understanding your intentions behind an open relationship. In addition to having the courage to bring up the idea of an open relationship with your current partner, you will also want to set specific guidelines. Just as no two monogamous relationships are the same, you and your partner will need to determine the logistics that work for your relationship.

3. Your Sex Drive is Not In Line With Your Partner’s

Human beings are sexual by nature. But, that doesn’t mean that your sex drive will always match up with your partners. In today’s times, we expect a lot from a life partner. Not only do we want them to be in tune with our needs, attractive, intelligent, and motivated, but we also expect that their sexual needs will align with our own. An open relationship can be a good way to meet your sexual needs, without having to give up on other important characteristics in a partner.

4. You Are Not Sure What You Want

If you’ve ever been slightly panicked by a relative’s pushy questioning into what you want to do with the rest of your life, then you have experienced a dose of what someone in an unnatural monogamous relationship feels like. The idea of choosing a life partner is similar to the major life decision of deciding what you want to do with the rest of your life. Just as we can’t know what we want to be when we’re children, you might not know what you want sexually, or even in a partner, without first experimenting.

Some people will spend their 20’s testing out different relationships. Others will jump back into the dating pool after a failed marriage. But, everyone has the same ultimate goal; to find relationship happiness. Open relationships give you the opportunity to test out new relationships and find what makes you happy. An open relationship doesn’t mean that you have to have numerous sexual partners. It simply means that you and your partner are open to trying. Opening your mind to an open relationship allows you to test out all new types of relationships and you no longer have to wonder, ‘what if?’.

Open relationships are often misunderstood and written off before you have the opportunity to consider their benefits. Monogamy does not come naturally to everyone and may not be the best option for every relationship. Ultimately, the best relationships are able to consider the needs of both partners and find a process that works.

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